You may have stumbled on this believing the secret code to improving a guy’s confidence would be something related to a drop dead gorgeous woman. But the answer is far more simpler than that.

There are men who get their confidence bruised when a woman succeeds at their expense but those kind of men need a different topic and time. Getting your ego bruised because of the success of a woman means you need to check how and where that ego was manufactured. From the onset your esteem was probably low, so this may be a topic for you after all.

Generally, men need a little confidence boost every now and then. Everyone does, but there’s nothing more attractive than a moderately confident man. Having too much confidence can just make you near-narcissist. You would find it very difficult to accept corrections or failure as this would severely demolish your confidence build.

The aim here is to get that secret code and run right? But it’s not that easy. There are many factors that come to play where confidence is concerned. These are; self-image, self-worth and self-esteem.

In order to have self-confidence, you need a positive self-image; and in order to have that, you need to know your self-worth; and to know your self-worth, you need a high self-esteem. They are all intertwined one way or the other.

Your self-image is the mental picture we all have about ourselves. First, there’s the ‘real’ image, and then there’s the ‘ideal’ image. The real image might be a nervous wreck who is reading this just because of that fact. Then the ideal image is that confident, hunky, successful, and cool version you have of yourself. 

It’s fantastic to have goals for the kind of person you want to be. But self-image isn’t completely accurate. If you grew up being told the definition of a successful man or woman. You paint that picture in your head over time. Even if you are doing an amazing job now, and are the envy of many, you would never see yourself as Ideal. This is because you believe you do not fit into that ideal image. So, let’s work on that self-worth.

You need to appreciate and value yourself. Don’t see yourself as mediocre but as just right. There is no one like you. Now, while this is quickly turning into some kind of motivational speech, don’t lose sight of what’s real. That is, you need to stand before a mirror and speak to yourself. 

– What do you like about yourself?

– What have you done successfully so far?

– What’s achievement to you?

– What are the bad things you have overcome?

Ask yourself questions and smile while doing it. If you believe your self esteem isn’t peachy, that’s fine, we’re getting there. Self esteem is a funny business. It gets up sometimes and down the next. It’s crazy but some suffer this far more than others. While some are on a constant low, others struggle between the high and low. But the lucky ones, are often on the high. 

Brain scan studies demonstrate that when your self-esteem is higher, you are likely to experience common emotional problems such as rejection and failure as less painful. It would also be easier to bounce back quickly. While having a low self esteem can cause you to be more vulnerable to anxiety. This anxiety causes more cortisol to be released into your bloodstream when under stress. And the longer you stay stressed, the longer it lingers.

Therefore, the goal is to know your self worth to boost your self esteem. This would then encourage you to have a positive self-image. It’s true! You can change your self-image. 

Remember, the goal is to boost that confidence, which at the end of the day, you can quite easily!

Follow these Note to Self and you can get that Boost your Need!

– Have a Positive Self Image.

– Change your attitude/behavior towards life.

– Create attainable goals.

– Break said goals into achievable bits.

– Speak positive affirmative words to yourself every now and then.

– Congratulate yourself for little achievements.

What Confidence boost works for you? What challenges do you face in boosting your confidence? Share your thoughts, while you share the BUZZ!